Explosive Enthusiasts say the darndest things.....

[Evan007]

I was just wondering what the most rediculous, humiliating, hilarious, or downright stupid things everybody has said in order to convince a paranoid nosey clerk, shop owner etc to sell you a chemical OTC.
Lines that work well are welcome.

I Once convinced a stupid clerk that i needed some nitrotoluene for my fish. As It gave there scales the most lovely shine :D . The poor fellow believed me. I feel sorry for those sort.

[T_Pyro]

I said that I wanted to make TNT and guncotton while buying some conc. nitric acid and sulfuric acid. Seriously though, did you actually expect people to confess to their... ah, creative talking skills while out shopping?

[Tuatara]

Funny thing is, I've always got a better response when I've told the supplier exactly what I want stuff for.
" I want 25kg of KNO3 for building rockets, and is your ammonium nitrate explosives grade?"
One cheque later and I had 25kg of each!

Maybe I just have an honest face :D

[Marvin]

Or maybe Tuatara, you made the guy scared enough to want you to leave as quickly, as quietly and as happily as possible.

[blindreeper]

When in a plumbing store asking for a 5m length of 2.5 inch HDPE pipe to be cut into 60cm long lenths they asked me "What is all this for son?" I said "I am making a fireworks motar rack" They replied "Right...sure thing, thats $15 thanks"

Sometimes people don't believe the truth, like out of pirates of the carribean - it's the honest ones you have to look out for!

[Haggis]

There was a sale on ammonium nitrate cold packs at Walmart, they were closing out a brand. Each pack with around 150g AN was going for 50 cents. So, of course, I filled a plastic bag with them, and tossed in two quarts of peroxide for good measure. The lady that checked me out seemed a bit befuddled about the nature of it all. I gave her the money, and as I was grabbing all the bags, she said, "What do you need all of that for?" I replied, as I was walking away, "It's just a hassle when your friends fall out of moving pickup trucks."

[Mr Cool]

A good one is to say you're getting it for your mother/wife etc if they ask what it's for. You can plead ignorance.
I think it was the "Talented Mr. Ripley" or something that gave me quite an effective technique. If you can tell that they're suspicious, hand them the money and ask for a certain combination of change, "for the bus" or something. It seems to stop them from asking whatever they were going to ask.

[MightyQuinn®]

My reply to anyone asking me "What I am doing:"

So long as it's legal, I tell them it's none of their concern.

I go to a pool store and buy supplies. Guy at the counter asks me what I need this stuff for. I look at him with a blank stare (like he has a third eye) and reply......"why for my pool, of course......duh"

You can also reply with something like "Is that question germane to completing this sale?"

I might be a little older than most, but I don’t take shit from people. At 6’ 4” and 250+. I don’t get many people giving me shit. :D

[Dave Angel]

It certainly gets easier as you get older, you tend to get asked less questions.

I avoid them by going to the youngest looking, blondest girl on a till if there is one. They really couldn't care less about their job nevermind what they sell as long as they get paid their minimum wage.

If I am questioned, I've always been tempted to tell them it's none of their business, or words to that effect, but I believe this would just bring unwanted attention. I usually check what the legitimate uses for what I will be buying are in advance so I can use the "why for my pool, of course......duh" line.

The ones that see right through you are generally going to be fellow pyros working at the till. I believe I may have come across one once. However, of all the possible cashiers, they are going to care the least despite knowing the most.

[tmp]

Usually, I'm not asked about what I'm using my items for. One very effective
technique is to talk to the clerk about anything other than what I'm buying.
Also it helps to buy other unrelated items if you need them and if possible
talk about one of those items - e.g. DVD, "Wow ! This is the best price I've
seen on this movie !" Like a magician's technique for illusion, focus the clerk's
attention away from anything suspicious.

[YayItGoBoom!]

I was purchasing 3 1 qt bottles of 3% hydrogen peroxide at Target, along with a pack of Pixie Stix (flavored sugar - so simple yet so addicting). So as she is bleeping them with the bar code reader (for lack of better termonology) she asks me "Bleaching your hair, huh?" It caught me by surprize (for one, I am naturally blonde), but I managed to get a spaced out "yeah." Then it clicked that I could use this to find out about higher concentrations of HP. So I asked her where i could get stronger stuff so I didn't have to buy so much, and she told me they didn't have any at the store, but a sallon might have them. Otherwise I've had pretty much no hassles. I bought 2 1 gallon jugs of 35% HCl and a gallon of acetone from Lowe's and she didn't even ask me a single question. Go figure. I guess you can't expect them always to be suspicious with 99% of purchases completely legit, they probably get tired of asking after a while.

[Trinitrotoluene]

It's best to just go pay at a register with some teenager working, I remember several years ago I was at a hardware store, it happand to be some teenage girl working. I brought a gallon on H2SO4 drain cleaner, two boxes to NaNO3 fertilizer four pound each, a small can of MEK, a liter of 30% H2O2 as wood bleach, I just went and paid for the items, no comments made. From a visit to another hardware store I was questioned after buying H2SO4 drain cleaner. Another suggestion is if some stores have self checkout lines, use them, to avoid being questioned.

[zaibatsu]

I find, at least in the UK, that you should never go to young (teenage) people at checkouts. They're usually being watched or are much more strict with rules about who can and cannot buy items. Also, do not go to very old people, they just tend to be arseholes to you. I find it much better to go to busy 30-50 year olds, as they just don't care.

The only times I've been ID'd for alcohol has been when I was old enough to buy it and went to some fucking teenager... I reassure myself with the idea that she just wanted to know my name ;) I live in hope anyway

[megalomania]

I prefer to say I am getting the items for my (insert friend, family member, significant other here) for their business and I don't know what it is for, I am only following orders. I also like to know what the legit uses of the stuff are before I go in.

[blindreeper]

My mum has always said to me "If its on their shelves and they sell it, its none of their god damn bussiness what you use it for, you pay for the goods you get the goods"
I suppose she is right, but I can't help myself thinking about excuses for the things I buy.

Mega, I used that technique the other day when getting sulfur from some hick store. They guy said "Doing some experimenting eh" whilst taking my money, I replied about how my brother and I were out picking up his bike from across the road (CBR 250 FYI) and that dad asked my to grab him some. Then he couldn't stop saying "Good on ya mate" Weird!

[T_Pyro]

That innocent ignorant approach works best when trying to get something (peroxide/permanganate etc.) from a medical store. I doubt whether it'd work for stuff like conc. acids and stuff, though...

[phoenix945]

Just this afternoon I went down to buy sodium hydroxide drain cleaner from the local supermarket. After taking a long time to decide I grabbed a drain cleaner containing 98% sodium hydroxide. I went to the only open checkout and the lady instantly asked "You aren?t making bombs with it are you?" I was surprised. I truefuly answered "No." I also said "I never thought it could be used for making bombs." she said "It can I studied it in law school." then I started to talk about all the formulas and shit that she wouldn?t understand. She answered to that. "I don?t understand you because I don?t watch the news." she must be pretty dam stupid to think this was about the news. I should have said. I am using it to unblock my thought it is very mucky or some other smart arse comment would have shut her right up. I said thank you, collected my change and pissed off.

++++++++++++++++++++

Please use ' instead of ? in words like DON'T and WOULDN'T. Thank you.

NBK

[john_smith]

Like Mega said. Elseway some clerk will eventually try to talk you into buying something better (and more expensive, of course) for your invented purpose. Happened all the time to me.

[tmp]

It's been awhile since I've read this thread. Zaibatsu, you have a good idea
there - go to a busy 30-50 year old clerk. You're right - they don't give a shit
and just want to get you out of that damn ASAP !

[Nickth3great]

Well, I supposed I've used variations of the majority of the tactics already disclosed here. I have also used 'disguises', well, sort of. Example.(and yes I have actually done this before, kinda pathetic isn't it?) I go to buy a few lbs of BP from the gun store, so I dress up in my redneck clothes and look like I know what I'm doing. I find that if you look like you belong there and know what you are doing, you are less likely to be questioned by the clerks. If I were going to buy a lot of what might be considered suspicious items from a hardware store I would probably ware a shirt I had worn while painting fixing up the house. Thankfully I have not yet been questioned by any of the incompetent service personal working at the hardware store, so I have not had to resort to my favorite and most extreme form of deception.