Definitive Auto Alarm..

[Nevermore]

I am buying a new car, and now i've the problem of putting a good alarm to avoid thieves from stealing it.
Since all the commercial alarms are crap (the thieves already know how to disable them and don't take more than 5 mins) and since i can't count on the immobilizer, i was thinking about building a custom alarm out from commercial equipments.

I was thinking about using a transponder device as key (those are easily found as upgrade for home alarm and they work at 12V) this will grant me full access to the car by getting in a 1 meter radius from the transponder, and as for the "alarm" device i was thinking about using a GSM combinator with the following features:

The alarm should be triggered when the car is opened and the transponder is not in range, must be triggered when the car turns on w/o transponder being in range, and must be triggered when the brake pedal is pressed.

Everything must be silent, the GSM should send a call to my cell phone and revert it to the audio amplifier so that i could talk and be heard by the speakers, the gsm should be able to accept DTMF codes that i could send from my cell phoned with the following features:
1) turning off the engine
2) horning like hell
3) opening an electro-actuated valve

So in case i get an alarm call that some fool is stealing my new car i could:

get control of the speaker and talk to the fool advicing him is better to stops and leave the car ASAP.

In case he is a big fool and is still inside,
turn off the engine in the middle of the street and put the car on horn..

in case he is VERY big fool that still tries to steal (i can hear by the microphone installed in the car) i would tell i am opening the cyanide tank then open the valve of the canister via DTMF that should disperse an irritant agent inside the car, so doing the asshole should swift out and disperse himself.

BUT:
which agent should i use that is very volative, doesn't leave nasty smells,or corrodes plastic, plus is easy to manifacture?

I was thinking about chloroacetone or bromoacetone, but i am not sure they won't eat up my car interiors, plus i can't still figure out an efficient dispersion system..

The agent shouldn't be deadly since i don't want to end up with a stupid asshole dead in my car (this arises problems over here, like, where should i trash, etc)
The agent shouldn't make him puke or shit or piss himself since i prefer my car keeps clean.

Any ideas?
:D

[Jacks Complete]

And gassing someone by remote control would be legal, would it?

Might I suggest using something pungent, like lemon oil or almond oil, which would scare the crap out of the intruder - after all, if you have been mental enough to fit this tricked out system in your car, you might well be enough of a loon to kill someone for it!

Onion juice would be good, too. Can't drive for tears!

[knowledgehungry]

Onion Juice wouldn't get out of the car for a long time. The average car thief doesn't know what HCN is, let alone what it smells like so almond juice would be a no-no. A fine spray of something with a "chemically" smell would be much better. The mist needs to be visible, the goal is to scare them off and if they see strange mist coming for them and your on the speaker telling them that they have 5 seconds to get out of the car before they asphyxiate my guess is they will get out mighty quick.

A problem I see is that most car thefts occur at night, are you that light of a sleeper?

[Silentnite]

What about some items from Firequest (www.firequest.com) ???

The stink bomb stuff, Vomit fluid injected via syringe into some kind of drink, or the evacuator. I personally think the evacuator one would be better, nothing like getting arrested with your pants full...
Or liquid roadkill or unnatural gas.

I think the drink one is the best idea. Just make it look like it hasn't been opened. :D

[Nevermore]

What about some items from Firequest (www.firequest.com) ???

The stink bomb stuff, Vomit fluid injected via syringe into some kind of drink, or the evacuator. I personally think the evacuator one would be better, nothing like getting arrested with your pants full...
Or liquid roadkill or unnatural gas.

I think the drink one is the best idea. Just make it look like it hasn't been opened. :D

you definitely got what i am looking for
i need something that scare them up to death and make them run like hell, but volatile enuf that i don't stink my car forever.
Beside that, something that is not just smell is preferrable, something non toxic that gives severe discomfort..
:D

@knowledgehungry
at night i can store my car in garage, most of times the thieves steal when u go to pub or take a pizza..that time i will be WELL awake.

[Nevermore]

And gassing someone by remote control would be legal, would it?

Might I suggest using something pungent, like lemon oil or almond oil, which would scare the crap out of the intruder - after all, if you have been mental enough to fit this tricked out system in your car, you might well be enough of a loon to kill someone for it!

Onion juice would be good, too. Can't drive for tears!

Gassing someone by remote is not legal, but i suppose he won't claim that at the police!
That's why i am gonna use something non toxic that doesn't let him drive anymore and scare him to hell.
If it was not so persistent capsicum would be the best..

BTW i dunno where u live, but NO ONE would be scared by lemon oil, even less by almond oil, maybe i could scare some children..maybe.. :eek:
:D

[knowledgehungry]

BTW i dunno where u live, but NO ONE would be scared by lemon oil, even less by almond oil, maybe i could scare some children..maybe..

Hydrogen Cyanide smells like almond oil, if something started spraying shit at me that smelled like almonds I'd be scared as shit.

EDIT: That website has some cool stuff, look at the specialty ammo :D /

[nbk2000]

They run out the car after smelling the stink of almond oil, then proceed to smash the shit out of it because they can't steal it. :)

After paying $500 insurance deductable to have all the windows and body panels replaced, you win! :rolleyes:

A little bit of chloropicrin dissolved in alcohol will do the trick and leave them crying and gasping for an hour. :) By which time they're either gone or caught, never having had time to even think about smashing your car up.

Air it out for a day, and you're good to go. :D

[Jacks Complete]

NBK, the odds are they wouldn't stand there and draw that much attention to themselves. They think they have been sprayed with Cyanide. They are going to be calling the police, and an ambulance.

The chloropicrin would be good, since it dissipates quite quickly, and acts quite fast. Chloroform would work too, either knocking them out, and giving them a hell of a hangover, or forcing them to leave the car.

Nevermore, a spray of lemon oil all over your face wouldn't affect you? You must have damned thick skin, then. Almost any essential oil will give a headache, and cause burns to the skin. Sure you aren't thinking of lemon *juice*? (even lemon juice would sting your eyes like buggery, though!) The point is that it is legal, it isn't going to kill *you* if you mess up and leave the system armed, but to the thief, the voice is telling you you are going to die, your eyes are watering, shit is all over the place... No-one is going to sit and wait to see if the oil that is stinging them is actually lethal or not!

KnowledgeHungry got the right idea for the almond oil...

Anyway, in the UK, just phoning the guy and threatening to hurt him if he doesn't leave the car is reason to get arrested, so I wouldn't want a system like this. In the UK, if you take the rear plate off your car, then it gets stolen, *you* can get done for having a car that isn't road legal, even though it has been stolen! Go figure!

What you could do, is use a smoke bomb. Simulate an engine fire, and then cut the fuel off. Car is worthless, they don't know they have been duped, they run before the car explodes (not that they do) In fact, you put a mole smoke under the hood with a wire wrapped round it, and a switch to it, in line with the ignition. Anyone who starts the car without turning off the switch heats the mole smoke, and the smoke starts coming off. To make it more realistic, put some form of time delay in before it goes off.
They have to leave eventually, since mole smokes kill the mole, they aren't nice!

[DirtyDan]

You might want to be careful that you don't make your unwanted driver too uncomfortable if he is already driving and something goes wrong with your alarm; totalling the car is not the goal here :) . Some good old commercial capsaicin (pepper spray) would be just as effective also, although I guess we are discussing mostly home synth gasses.

[MightyQuinn®]

I was thinking about a cellular operated microswitch behind the glove box. Have that microswitch cut the power wire to the car's ECU. This would result in a total shutdown of the vehicle. You can crank it all you want, it's dead.

No car to steal, no need for fragrant oils or powerful potions - just one pissed off jig with his dick and a dead car in his hand.

From here you proceed to NBK's thought of it getting trashed a little - deductible - you win

[Silentnite]

If your working on the entire Disable thing, or even the spray, couldn't you put a pen camera in the steering wheel to take a picture of the jerk?

It would seem pretty easy to wire it so it only took a picture when it was opened without a key.

[Nevermore]

Anyway, in the UK, just phoning the guy and threatening to hurt him if he doesn't leave the car is reason to get arrested, so I wouldn't want a system like this. In the UK, if you take the rear plate off your car, then it gets stolen, *you* can get done for having a car that isn't road legal, even though it has been stolen! Go figure!


i think is something alike here too..
is so shit this country, they think about protecting the thieves more than the others..
the police is sleeping all day long and you can't even protect yourself..
I should gas the police not the thieves, is them that are not doing their work..
:mad:

[Jacks Complete]

DirtyDan, you contradicted yourself.

Capsicum will almost certainly cause them to crash.

Don't be a fool.

MightyQuin(tm), using a cellphone is probably an issue. You would have trouble getting one that didn't run on a contract, or require money put on it even so often. The only way around that I can think of, would be to get a phone that had a long time before deletion. You would have to enquire with the provider. I have seen boxes sold for this purpose, but they cost far more than a cheap mobile, but they are wired to switches and relays and things.

Realistically, you could make a fortune selling a GSM mobile controlled box that you could run via a SIM card of your choice, and a mobile phone. Anyone ever seen anything like it?

Nevermore, gassing the cops might bring some heat down on you. Might I suggest discression as being the better part of valour?

[Nevermore]

Well here GSM alarm devices are sold easily, they don't cost more than normal phone, use a prepaid card that requires to be recharged once a year..
not too bad..
GSM devices for house alarms are commercial here, not yet for cars

[Valinomycin]

I searched a little bit and found a gsm transmitter that only needs a active sim card. It's got 2 inputs and sends you an sms if activated. You can control the 2 two outputs of the transmitter via sms. The only drawback is it costs 200€ without a sim card :(
the shop i found it is www.conrad.de (it's in german search for TELEMETRIEMODUL)